I keep notes in my phone about workouts. I actually keep notes in my phone about everything (including weird chapter-starts for books that I’ll never finish-lame) and if I ever lose my phone, whomever finds it could write a very strange book about crap that poured out of my head. . . . . but today is about workout notes.

Mainly, I jot down a little bit about what temperature it was and what I wore (not for fashion, but because I live 3000 miles away from where I used to and it is like quantum physics for me to figure out how to layer in my new environment), how I felt after my workout , what to bring/leave at home next time, you know, just adorable little “post its to myself.”

This morning, getting ready for my run, I pulled it up to see if I was cold the last time I ran the Penwood Trail at this time of day and, in a ridiculous effort at procrastination, I scrolled through some old notes to myself. Here’s a random selection of the positive little things that I tell myself:

After an especially difficult hot yoga class: Next time bring a towel, you yeti. You bent over and sweat dripped up your nose!!!

After a series of one minute intervals over 3.5 miles: You kind of suck at this. How hard would it be to just run faster? Come on!

After a pick-up work out in the park with a super cool personal trainer: Note to self-work out with her more often. Everything hurts so GOOOOOD.

And, in case you think that I’m always mean (not true, the nice notes just aren’t as funny as when I’m picking on myself)–

After a recovery yoga class on my last long run day: Somebody did pigeon without crying! Look who spanked the pigeon! Woot Woot! (P.S. cheering is frowned upon in this studio-especially pigeon spanking themed cheering–dumb)